Midwest vs the South…

So, I stumbled across THIS POST last week, and with one home game in the south under my belt I thought I would try to give my own input.
Just to give some more insight into us Southern girls:

Football Season:

North vs. South
WOMEN’S ATTIRE
Up North: Chapstick in their back pocket and a $20 bill in their front pocket, cute clothes supporting whichever team you feel like.
Down South: Louis Vuitton duffel with two lipsticks, powder, mascara (waterproof), concealer, decked out in team colors…adorableness over warmth of course 😉
STADIUM SIZE
Up north: College football stadiums hold 500.
Down south: High school football stadiums hold 20,000
WEATHER
Up North: Snow and Ice.
Down South: Sunny, highs mid-60s, lows in the teens.
FATHERS
Up North: Expect their daughter to understand Sylvia Plath.
Down South: Expect their daughters to understand pass interference.
ATTIRE
Up North: Male and female alike: woolly sweater or sweatshirt, jeans.
Down South: Male – pressed khakis, oxford shirt, cap with frat logo, Justin Ropers. Female – ankle-length skirt, coordinated cardigan, flat riding boots, oxford.
ALUMNI
Up North: Hang on the sidelines talking about the good ole’ days.
Down South: Tailgate, are the loudest fans in the stands and actually can call a player by name!
CAMPUS DECOR
Up North: Statues of Founding Fathers.
Down South: Statues of Founding Fathers and Heisman Trophy winners.
HOMECOMING QUEEN
Up North: Also a physics major.
Down South: Also Miss USA.
HEROES
Up North: Their favorite Business Prof
Down South: “Bear” Bryant
GETTING TICKETS
Up North: Tickets? We don’t charge, then no one would come!!
Down South: People start hinting for tickets in August…for the November game.
FRIDAY CLASSES AFTER A THURSDAY NIGHT GAME
Up North: Students and Teachers are not sure if they are going because they have class on Friday.
Down South: Teachers cancel class on Friday because they don’t want to see the few hungover students that might actually make it to class on Friday.
PARKING
Up North: An hour or two before game time the university opens the campus for game parking. (Or for some, wandering in during the national anthem complaining they can’t get a close parking spot.
Down South: RV’s sporting their school flags begin arriving on Wednesday for the weekend’s festivities. The real faithful begin arriving on Tuesday.
GAME DAY
Up North: A few students party in the dorm and watch ESPN on TV.
Down South: every student wakes up, has a beer for breakfast, and rushes over to where ESPN is broadcasting Game Day “Live” to get on camera and wave to the idiots from up North who wonder why game day is never broadcast from their campus.
TAILGATING
Up North: What is tailgating? Running through McD’s on the way to the game?
Down South: 30-foot custom pig-shaped smoker fires up at dawn. Cooking accompanied by live performance by Hootie & the Blowfish, who come over during breaks and ask for a hit off your bottle of bourbon.
GETTING TO THE STADIUM
Up North: You have to ask, “Where’s the stadium?” When you find it you walk right in with no line.
Down South: When you’re near it, you’ll hear it. On game day, it becomes the state’s third largest city.
CONCESSIONS
Up North: Drinks served in a paper cup filled to the top with soda.
Down South: Drinks served in a plastic cup with the home team’s mascot — filled less than halfway to ensure enough room for bourbon.
WHEN THE NATIONAL ANTHEM IS PLAYED
Up North: Stands are less than half full.
Down South: 100,000+ fans sing along in perfect 3-part harmony.
THE SMELL IN THE AIR AFTER THE FIRST SCORE
Up North: Nothing changes.
Down South: Fireworks with a twist of bourbon.
COMMENTARY (MALE)
Up North: “Nice play.”
Down South: “ — tackle him and break his legs!!!”
COMMENTARY (FEMALE)
Up North: “My, this is a violent sport.”
Down South: “ — tackle him and break his legs!!!”
AFTER THE GAME
Up North: the stadium is empty before the game ends.
Down South: Another rack of ribs on the smoker. While somebody goes to the nearest package store for more bourbon, planning begins for next year’s party.
CHURCH THE NEXT DAY
Up North: hey coach, did you guys start your season yet?
Down South: hey coach, wow, great game yesterday, #19 had a sweet tackle at 3 and 5 in the 3rd qtr!
ANNOUNCERS:
Up North: Man the visiting team sure looks sad today ha,ha,ha their coaches must not know how to coach!
Down South: well, we may be winning right now, but this opponent (who ever they are) has trained hard and things can turn at any time. Always respect the opponent.

As I said, the majority of this is from THIS POST from 2007 🙂 Hey, it’s fall y’all!

PPS-I picked up my first issue of Southern Living the other day and if you don’t believe this post check out THIS LINK which shows the latest game day fashions (make sure to check prices) and THIS LINK about Game Day food. Football is a way of life here!

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